Shit Advertisers Say: US Army

Seen on Reddit

We are a team of a million unique and powerful individuals. And we’ve got a job for you. What’s your warrior?

These are your tax dollars at work, folks. I bet the money the US Army spent putting this propaganda on Reddit could have covered medical care and therapy for at least half a dozen disabled war veterans. Hell, I wonder how many hungry children could be fed and vaccinated with the money spent on this propaganda. Probably a shitload.

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.

This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. The cost of one modern heavy bomber is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. It is two electric power plants, each serving a town of 60,000 population. It is two fine, fully equipped hospitals. It is some fifty miles of concrete pavement. We pay for a single fighter with a half-million bushels of wheat. We pay for a single destroyer with new homes that could have housed more than 8,000 people. . . . This is not a way of life at all, in any true sense. Under the cloud of threatening war, it is humanity hanging from a cross of iron.

~President Dwight Eisenhower, 1953

What they aren’t going to tell you is that every man jack in this man’s Army started out as a unique individual, but the whole point of basic training is to break all that uniqueness down and build you up as a warrior ready to make the world safe for multinational corporations. But if you can’t afford to go to college or trade school and come from an area that’s been so thoroughly neglected that your job prospects are limited to Dollar General or the US Army, I can’t blame you for choosing the latter.

But if you’re joining to get out of poverty, you’re not a unique and powerful warrior. You’re a victim of economic conscription. Just don’t expect me to thank you for your service. I’m not the CEO of a multinational corporation, so you weren’t doing it for me. And if you don’t like my attitude, blame Smedley Butler. Reading “War is a Racket” redpilled me back when I had recruiters calling my house in high school.

To be honest, I miss the old “Be All That You Can Be” slogan from the 1980s. It was more easily parodied, but I guess In Living Color ruined that.

Be all that you can be
Get an ugly wife and a messed up life in the Army

In Living Color: Anton at the Recruiter
Wikipedia: Economic Conscription
“War is a Racket” by Major General Smedley Butler (USMC)
President Dwight Eisenhower: “The Chance for Peace”